Climbing out of the box

CLIMBING OUT OF THE BOX

Knowing there is a good chance you will be boxed in @ some point in your life and career as a person and player gives you a heads up on preparing yourself for the task. Every person sees a player different. It helps to have the right people like you. It starts with the scouts and then it starts all over again with management, human resource people and coaching staff. Climbing out of the box is a two-way relationship. People in charge want to help you out and you have to be willing to climb. If you want something out of people in charge, you will have to have something to give in return.

As we travel around the hockey world, we continue to think of ideas that would help people help themselves. One trend that seems to affect our youth more and more each year I work in this business is when people “box in” a person with no support system to help them climb out of the “box”. Rating systems, evaluation camps and short tryout camps all have potential of “boxing you in”.

All players have one or more unique skills that allow them to contribute in a team setting. Most have aspirations beyond the ratings given to them. Solid upbringing and good organizations provide people with a support setting that keeps them reaching and climbing. Adult support systems beyond the immediate family are paramount. Why is it that the best players have the greatest support systems in place and functioning on all cylinders? This is a lesson for all us to make sure all players have a similar system.

Knowledgeable people realize they always have to prove themselves; this is life. We never arrive. The harm comes from management and coaching having to live up to their report that “boxes in” the person. Conversely the people in the box have to recognize what it will take to please the people “boxing them in”. More and more organizations are adding player development people to guard against any mistakes in judgment or pre-judgment. Junior camps and specialty camps fall in the same line. Once they show what others believe they have or don’t have, these same people feel the pressure to justify their reports.

Colleges have camps young people attend with a dream of being recruited. If they don’t perform in the top dozen, they get “boxed in”. Junior teams hold three (3) day tryouts and attempt to select the right players for their teams when in reality they only have a couple of spots (if any) open. They, too, “box in” players and eventually the word leaks out.

In the NHL, GM’s, their management teams and coaches come in contact with players after they are drafted. They have not been witness to their performance and upside that was shown in the environment they were part of when they were drafted. This is one more reason why player development personnel have a value if they have seen the player in their draft year. The same holds true for human resource people involved in personnel. Playing a role in the interview process is encouraged, also.

If “boxing in” is creating awareness of assets or liabilities and people recognize that they have, or will be given, the tools needed to climb out of the box, it seems to work out fine. People with a solid upbringing recognize they are obligated to validate and anoint themselves, still most of us need help getting to the level we would like to go.

The danger of all this is written statements are a matter of record, people in charge have the best chance of proving themselves right and there are some who will spend the time to prove themselves right.

One question to ask is how many make it without TLC (tender loving care)? We believe there are a very low percentage of people capable of climbing out of a box without a support system in place. Those few maintain a “chip on their shoulder” mentality and are out to prove the world wrong in every situation. Some are accustomed to doing it all of their lives. Those who struggle are the players who go through Squirt, PeeWee, Bantam, Midget and High School without facing any degree of scrutiny. Life is fine. All is well. They go through the system unscathed.

They move in to Junior and College. Some are drafted by a professional organization and the scrutiny begins. Scrutiny is the number one reason for any fatigue they encounter. The more the scrutiny, the harder they work. It’s not long before they come to the conclusion that their hard work is the reason they are tired. This could not be further fm the truth. Scrutiny and boxing players in leads to fatigue and that fatigue could lead to players failing to maximize their potential and become what others believed they could be.

We draft, select or choose people for what we believe they can be, and then we scrutinize and box them in so they have a hard time realizing their aspirations or becoming what we believed they could be.

While scrutiny in various forms is the primary reason behind burn out, creative practices (sophisticated) prevent burn out by making practices more sophisticated than the game plan. Trying things in practice you wouldn’t think of in a game, beating people one on one, joining the rush, trying a play in a high risk area are all enjoyable things to do on an ice sheet and when things break down, or there is a bad turnover, it’s just a reminder to consider the consequences of your actions in a play-off game.

Drills that actually “teach” hockey sense, a skill that I believe you can acquire when a mentor lays out the guidelines for different situations. All you have to do is layout the sequence of events that will happen every time on a 3 on 2 rush, for just one example, and you have laid the groundwork to be creative. No one is telling you where to pass. They are showing you what and how the different options are as you go move down the ice sheet.

Life is all about believing in yourself with help from others believing in you. It helps to reaffirm that we care, love and believe in a person. It needs to be said more than once. We’ve talked to a lot of athletes over the years, but not enough as they move in to manhood with an attitude, swagger, boldness and competitive instinct reserved for quality people and athletes. They are on the cusp of acquiring these intangibles, are unaware of them, don’t care if you have them or all of the above.

We believe the end result will be people becoming what we’ve always believed they can be. If you go to http://www.mnhockeycamps.com/ , you will find the quote @ the bottom of our home page. This quote is for young people like you and holds true for all of the young men and women who have trained and worked @ our camp over the years. You have every reason to be positive about tomorrow and the future. You will get “bolder” @ what you do when you are using your God-given talent. Your chances for success are greater when you understand the process and let your conscience be your best teammate.

We would be liars if we said we didn’t need the love, caring, positive reinforcement and validation of things we do well, but we also need to recognize we were put on this earth to validate and anoint ourselves. Hearing it bolsters our confidence, self-esteem and composure to function in life more than reading it. As long as we know the caring is there, we should be fine. We’re all the same on this earth when it comes to basic psychological needs and we want you to know you are something special. We continue to tell you who you are because we don’t need the risk of someone else telling you who you are unless it gives you incentive to become what we believe you can be.

“If we don’t continue to tell someone what we believe they can be, someone else will be eager to let them know their thoughts.”

It’s human nature to crave recognition and praise for things we do well. We are all aware of this basic psychological need. Your faith and belief in yourself will come from all the good we see in you and we see nothing but good in you. We would be fooling ourselves if we said we do not need help from others to get where we want to go in the game and life. Our relationships with people have always been about believing and improvement; whether improving your game or your life. There is no greater experience in life than helping people help themselves. Successes through relationships in life are more important to us than any accomplishments.

“The success stories of people in our lives are our greatest accomplishments.”

Our beliefs in people don’t change but situations do. In the hockey world, our only real chance to connect is during the summer months. While hockey has a way of taking us in different directions, the purpose should remain the same.

We have had these discussions with a lot of our staff, campers and draft picks over the years. We talk about being a detail person and caring about others before any personal gain. We talk about the joy of forming lifetime relationships on winning teams and teams in general. We talk about enjoying your high school experience, working harder and moving on to the next levels. We talk about the fun a person can have training and sweating with your teammates and friends. We talk about a lot of things. It is one of the most pressure packed settings a person can experience because we have to add in my caring level for parents and grandparents. If we make one mistake when mentoring anyone, it is a criminal offense.

The end results are people coaching and/or playing and sometimes winning Championships @ high school and junior age, moving in to junior, college and professional ranks and some winning a Stanley Cup while building memories no one can ever take away fm them. The real end result was the satisfaction I got out of watching them work behind the bench, skate on the ice; some @ the highest possible level for a Stanley Cup.

You have to be patient enough to understand you can only do what’s required to help a body mature. This, along with the realization you play responsibly, develop your skill set and are good with the puck, will enhance your game. When that happens, your mind will do the rest. Bottom line you need to play hockey as long as you can. Continue to critique yourself constructively so you can continue to be productive in helping your team win, but keep all of those thoughts positive.

“Constructively critique yourself without destroying yourself and you will become what others believe you can be. Negative talk and thinking, whether conscious or sub-conscious, has a way of contaminating our goals and objectives in life. ”

We’ve always believed in writing or saying our thoughts to people. It’s all fm the heart. Our goal is cultivating the attitude, swagger, boldness and competitive instinct that you possess. Dean Grillo says, “That person is going to be just fine, Dad. All they need is some time to grow and mature. They will figure it out, but they could use some TLC.” We discuss these things all the time with the hopes we all get better @ helping others help themselves. Our wish is Dino, and Carrie, takes the same approach with newly born Piper Elizabeth Grillo.

When it’s all said and done, our main accomplishments in life are those we helped. We can take that with us. All the material things stay on Earth. Keep working and believing and you will be just fine. Use your experience with people “boxing you in” as incentive to prove others wrong. Play with a “chip on your shoulder mentality” and you will be just fine. We all have a certain skillset. We only need to reach a threshold in the area. The mindset is waiting to be developed if you give it a chance, and it will develop if you give it a chance. You haven’t let anyone down yet. You have time on your hands and you have assets and a mindset that needs to be cultivated.

We never give up on those who show us a glimpse of excellence or those we care about. They might, but we don’t. “Chip on your shoulder” mentality I would recommend to any player; boxed in or not.

"Our lives count only if family, friends and people in need come first. What we do for people in need (especially youth), and those embarking on a new career path, means more than anything else in life. Enjoy life by connecting with others and giving back. Do all this and everything will fall in to place? You help others become what you believe they can be.”

Minnesota Hockey Camps (MHC) has been a great place for every person who stepped on the grounds. Our only bad experiences are fm young people realizing they “thought” they loved the game, “thought” they loved to train, “thought” they loved to work hard and “thought” they were committed. Some end up a little bitter about it but most realize they have to step it up to be something in hockey and in life. Ninety-nine % of all players are in a catch up mode if they want to be the best @ what they do. The other 1% are looking over their shoulders to stay ahead of their competitor in the game and in life.

We are a place with the physical plant, staff and program that creates an awareness of assets and liabilities and builds fm there while recognizing it’s a long, hard working and memorable journey if you want to be an athlete or success story in life. This is true for our athletes as well as our staff.

We are a proud place where every person fits because we mirror real life and what it takes to be successful in any endeavor. This is why every person fits @ MHC and this is why MHC is a special place in countless lives and careers.


-Ole Gringo-

ã copyright Chuck Grillo, Minnesota Hockey Camps
24621 So Clark Lake Rd P.O. Box 90 Nisswa, MN 56468-0090
Phone 218.96.2444 Fax 218.963.2325 Email chuck@mnhockeycamps.com
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